Where are the parents? Probably watching Maury..

[abandonreality]

Girl, 11, assaulted by 20 males.

Ok, Originally found this at Seren's journal and initially it triggers the 'OMFG, THOSE MONSTERS!' reaction.  Then you realize that most of the 20 were in fact children themselves.  Question:  What are they learning at home that they even think for a moment that this is "fun"?  I am a parent of a six-year-old girl and live in a large metropolitan area. This generation and I believe I can safely say the next one that includes my child (and THAT, my friends is what frightens me more) is just going to to get worse just from viewing the way fellow parents are raising their children.

There is NO parental responsibility or discipline in the home anymore. More and more I see parents blaming their child's problems on everyone and everything other than themselves or their child. Parents are not parents, they try to be friends and companions first and that is WRONG. A child must have limits and to get along in society and it is an injustice to the child to do otherwise.

I believe this problem started probably along the time when we began worrying about hurting our children's "feelings" by punishing them. (yes, I have heard a parent say such a thing) That it will crush their fragile self-esteem NOT to have everything they make grabby hands at or to be told no.  They give their child everything it asks for and then wonder why he rapes someone when she tells him no.

Let me make one thing clear...children are not innocent little angels to be spoiled and are not "blank slates". I don't care what the psychologist says. My child came into the world with a definite personality that I had to learn to react to accordingly. And a child will try to get away with what they can and test their limits and you. Chloe tries to manipulate me on a DAILY basis and she is a good kid.  And if you don't show them who is in charge of your home and who is the parent first, your is a house full of anarchy, which translates my friends into a society of anarchy.

We have reaped what we have sowed. Its going to take a lot of work fix it, mostly starting with the next generation....

This is my public service announcement I guess.  I just had to get it off my chest.  *feels chest*  Aahh, better!

Comments

[acdragonmaster.livejournal.com]

*applauds*

That, is so very, very true. And I can personally attest to the fact that if my parents hadn't been very firm in setting and enforcing rules at home, I probably would have little to no respect for such things now.

And the real ironic thing is, people actually appreciate having boundries. Sure, it's never pleasent to be told no, but it isn't satisfying to be just handed everything you want. Not to mention, it shows that the parents actually care for their kids, that they'd take the time to make sure they learn to behave properly. People really do need to take more personal responsibility, and acknowledge that there ARE consequences for their actions.

[abandonreality.livejournal.com]

It is ironic. Children (adults also) are HAPPIER with boundaries. They need them. Chaos and anarchy are what make them insecure and hurt their self-esteem, not telling them no. Another thing we have a problem with as parents and society is the 'follow thru'. You can threaten to punish all you want, (this goes for the penal system AND in the home), but if you don't ACTUALLY punish for the offense or action, there is no learning or rehabilitation.

Thats one thing that I think my husband and myself have always tried to do no matter what, follow-thru. It shows that you mean what you say, not just about punishment, but also about other things as well. Lets face it, if you keep telling someone your going to do something and you don't eventually no one is going to listen to you anymore.

*looks up* Lord, I feel like I need to be pushed off my soap-box...8B

[acdragonmaster.livejournal.com]

*nods* Oh, I agree. I mean, I've noticed it when I've moderated on forums, the mod who actually enforces the rules is generally the favorite, not the one who lets people do what they want. And sheesh, look at how any unorganized group of people will automatically follow someone who starts giving orders. People definitely like boundries, yes, this is why we have things like borders all neatly drawn on maps and fences clearly marking the property lines.

[laurabryannan.livejournal.com]

Group mentality. Humans will often do horrible things in a group of others doing the same--things they would never do if they were alone.

That poor little girl. If she's chasing boys at age 11, my call is that she's had it pretty horrible at home. You don't get sexualized at that age unless that's the only way you know to get love and attention. I'll bet these kids aren't the first humans raping her.

[3-jane.livejournal.com]

Oh, honey, don't even start me on the Janey Rant-o-matic. I used to work with at risk six- through thirteen-year olds, and I can't tell you what lengths I had to go to to track parents down, just to tell them things like 'hey, your kid is suicidal' and 'your daughter hasn't spoken for a week straight, what's going on?'. Usually, I got the 'what do you want me to do about it?' response, which ... yeesh. .___.

It seems harder and harder to find children raised in an environment that's neither too laissez-faire, nor too controlling - 'cause that makes for problems, too - but, scariness.